Apple, We Need to Talk… Again.

What is going on with you, guy? You have like, split personality disorder or something. First you approve “Baby Shaker”, then you deny our poor, defenseless CrudeBox app. Where is your judgment at these days?

Apple, I checked my GReader this morning to find that you’re at it again! I scroll down and see this story about Porn finally being available in the app store. I was floored. This might be the first time in history when a man was upset by porn. Do you know why I was upset?

If you don’t recall: a few days back (for the 4th time) — you denied our second and third soundboard application. And for the same reason as before, it was denied due to offensive content — even after it was submitted as a 17+ application! We did that despite not having ONE swear word in the application — not even an insinuation that couldn’t be found in a PG-13 movie! When I found out that you denied the application again, I was pissed. Hell – I’m livid (for those of you keeping track at home, that’s like pissed x10).

WAIT. THIS JUST IN: The Hottest Girls app was just removed from the App store. Color me not surprised. This is like Baby Shaker all over again. You sure know how to get good PR!

Anyway, I hope you’re still listening because I’m about to say what you haven’t said in the past few months, despite speculation. Explicit content (content not dealing with unicorns or rainbows) will never be allowed in the App Store (well, unless someone ‘accidentally’ lets it slip through — but that doesn’t count — it seems to always get pulled within 24 hours). Again, for those of you keeping track at home and in the blogosphere — you’re thinking: ‘But Apple released Parental Controls in iPhone OS 3.0 — they have to let explicit content through, what else would the 17+ rating feature be used for?!’. That my friends, is called smoke and mirrors. Think about it logically — there are still going to be iPhone OS 2.0 legacy devices in the hands of the generally public that aren’t going to be upgraded at any point in the near future. Without the upgrade, the phone isn’t compatible with parental controls, thus not compatible with explicit applications. Could Apple make it so you are forced to upgrade to 3.0? In short, no. They cannot force iPod Touch users to pay $10 for the upgrade. Could they make it so explicit apps are only allowed to be downloaded to 3.0 devices? Sure. Will they? No. Why would Apple have any intentions on segmenting the App Store when they won’t even respond to the use of the parental control system built into 3.0. Seriously Apple, please tell me, how do you plan on using parental controls if you don’t have the intellectual fortitude to allow a “rated” apps into the App Store.

Apple, you never cease to amaze me.

PrudeBox is FREE FREE FREE!!

We are happy to announce that because of Alkali Media’s success with Drum FX Pro, PrudeBox will now be available on Apple’s App Store for free until Sunday, June 28th!

Drum FX Pro has been doing very well (number 51 on the app store under “Paid Music Apps”), which is why we decided that we would allow all of our loyal customers download our first application for FREE!

For those that may not know, PrudeBox was an international sensation when it came out, due to its controversial story, which was discussed by prestigious web blogs like Boing Boing Gadgets, Mobile Crunch, The Download Squad, and AOL’s Daily Finance. Though it has been some time since our original post about PrudeBox, the trials and tribulations of developers vs. Apple’s App Store are still going strong. After that original story, it was even featured on MSNBC’s “10 Controversial Apps” list. PrudeBox had lots of success, and it was thanks to all of you. So from Alkali Media, thanks very much!

As always, if you have questions, comments, concerns, or videos of you using one of our apps in a unique or creative way, email us at alkalimedia@gmail.com

To pick up a copy of PrudeBox just head on over to the Alkali Media Apps Page here.

Drum FX Pro Bangs Its Way Into Apple’s App Store

After some App Store woes, we were finally able to roll out our second application, Drum FX Pro. Though other drum kit simulators may claim to be the best, we’d like to think our focus on quality and additional auxiliary percussion sounds, like the vibraslap and drum solos, really make make our app stand out. There is nothing quite like having a pocket-sized drum kit with other unique sounds available at all times. There is even a “Joke Roll” (think ‘rimshot’), which is a perfect compliment to a terrible joke!

Drum FX Pro vital stats:

• A total of 22 high quality percussion and drum sounds
• Virtual 5-Piece Drum Kit, which includes a Snare Drum, High, Mid and Floor Toms, and Bass Drum. Also included are High-Hats, 2 Crash Cymbals, a Splash Cymbal, and a Ride Cymbal
• 8 playable percussion instruments and sounds which include: Guiro, Maracas, Sleigh Bells, Tambourine, Triangle, Vibraslap, Whistle, & the Joke Roll
• 4 amazing Drum Solos

At the time of writing this, Drum FX Pro is already the 54th most downloaded paid music app! Try it out and see for yourself!

Comments, questions, concerns, a video of you using one of our applications? Hit us up at AlkaliMedia@gmail.com.

If you would like to be the proud owner of this wonderful application, a drum kit that fits in your pocket, you can download it from iTunes here.

Update! New Apps (soon), Ratings, Success!

Hey Guys,

It’s been a little while since we last updated everyone on what’s been going on in the Alkali Media world. We’ve been working on a few new iPhone apps, and we still have a few in for approval. We had a pair of applications rejected again for the whole offensive content thing… However, we were waiting for what looked like some promise with the iPhone OS 3.0 update, and yesterday we saw some light at the end of the tunnel with the announcement of Parental Controls integrated into the software, as well as a rating system for all App Store Applications at Apple’s annual WWDC. With that, the apps are in for approval again!

We’ve got a few other things in the works right now, so hopefully we’ll be getting multiple applications into the store in the very near future. For now, don’t forget to check out PrudeBox, now apparently world famous for its flamboyant facelift.

Thanks for your continued support, and we’ll be updating you as soon as we have some more news.

Peace!
Chris, Pat & Mike